The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire

You need to stop playing round with all them clowns and the wangstas/ Good girls gotta get down with them gangstas/ Go head girl put some back and some neck up on it/ While I stand up in the background and check up on it

Today was chemo day. I had two ideas for today's post, one sullen and sort of sad, the other bright and upbeat. I feel like I've bitched and moaned a lot about this whole cancer thing, so I've decided to write about the good parts of having cancer.

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yeah, OK, there are no good parts of having cancer, but I still want to be positive today, even though cancer and chemo really really suck.

Ohh Boy you looking like you like what you see/ Won't you come over check up on it,/ I'ma let you work up on it/ Ladies let em check up on it,/ watch it while he check up on it/ Dip it,/ pop it,/ twirk it,/ stop it,/ check on me tonight

My t-shirt for today proclaims "My oncologist is better than your oncologist". I got a few smiles from patients in the waiting room, and chuckles from some of the nurses. My oncologist loved it. He really is a great doctor, and we share the same sense of humor. Good news/bad news today; I'm going to have a cat scan next week to check on the progress of the chemo, and I'm getting an extra week off this round, and he kept the dosage low, but we're still looking at two or three months of chemo.

If you got it flaunt it,/ boy I know you want it/ While I turn around you watch me check up on it/ Oohhh you watchin me shake it,/ I see it in ya face /Ya can't take it,/ it's blazin,/ you watch me in amazement/ You can look at it,/ as long as you don't grab it/ If you don't go braggin/, I might let you have it/ You think that I'm teasin/, but I ain't got no reason/ I'm sure that I can please you/, but first I gotta read you

I was in a fairly good mood today. I was talkative, and smiles while getting my chemo. I don't know what is wrong with me! Of course, I had a good time last week. I was able to go out, see some friends and have fun. I had not one, not two, not even just three, but five different flirty moments last week. This never happens to me, women don't hit on me, ask anyone, but last week was the exception. Sunday Chris and I went to a movie and then did something we haven't done since college, we just drove for a few hours. I also got to see his sons, and Simon called me Uncle Billy for the first time! He remembered who I was. Yeah, you can see why I've been in a good mood.

I can tell you wanna taste it,/ but I'm gone make you chase it/ You got to be patient,/ I like my men patient/ More patience,/ you take might get you in more places/ You can't be abrasive,/ have to know to pace it/ If I let you get up on it,/ you gotta make a promise/ That you gone put it on me,/ like no ones put it on me/ Don't bore me,/ just show me,/ all men talk but don't please./ I can be a tease,/ but I really wanna please you

The thing that made me happiest today though was music. I powered up my mp3 player and had the ear plugs in for the whole day. It's amazing how a song can change the way you feel. While I tapped away to an eclectic list of songs ranging from classical to hard core industrial, there was one song that I kept going back to today. Can you guess what it is yet? I think you can. Yup, against all expectations you may have about me, it was Beyonce's "Check On It"

I'm checking on you boo,/ do what chu do/ And while I dance/ I'ma glance/ at this beautiful view/ I'm keep my hands in my pants,/ I need to glue em with glue...

Say what you will about me, but this is a really catchy tune. I first heard it on the bland top 40 station here in NY. Don't ask me why I was even listening. Then I saw the video! Beyonce is right up there with Salma and Scarlett. Part of the reason I like the song is that in invokes a clear memory of her moving like no other human could ever move. Another reason I like this song is the lyrics are fun and playful, they are funny, they actually make me smile.

Ohh Boy you looking like you like what you see/ Won't you come over and check up on it,/ I'ma let you work up on it/ Ladies let em check up on it,/ watch it while he check up on it/ Dip it,/ pop it,/ twirk it,/ stop it,/ check on me tonight

If in the midst of all this crap I can find something to make me smile, be it cheesey or sublime, or popular, or inane, or whatever, I'm more than willing to put aside my intellectual snobbery and have a smile.

I would also like to add that you guys rock!! I love so much that you all take the time to check this blog. My writing is crap today, but you get the idea. To all the new friends I've made through this blog, thanks so much for your kind words. Dave, I know you cry about me when you're alone, I won't tell anyone. Jody, keep running, but sweetie don't kill yourself, pain is pain, from cancer or from depriving your muscles of needed nutrients, it's ok to bitch about it. Jenny, have fun in China, I miss you. Doug and Naomi, I have more wine. Charly, I hope you're feeling well. I miss you, but better we don't hang out too much given our conditions. I love you!!! Lance, we really need to get together soon and do some heavy damage to our livers. Heather....oh Heather....my goddess of meat and all things blue. You make me smile too, and with any luck, you'll get the chance to make me smile in person soon.